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SPEW: PLEASE Stop Covering The Toilet Seat With Toilet Paper

If you think you're protecting your ~private~ parts by laying down toilet paper before you perch your posterior on the seat, boy do we have some bad news for you.

Scientists have pointed out that, quite pleasingly, our toilets are actually designed to be as resistant to germs as possible; the bowl shape helps to prevent germs from clinging to the surface, reducing bacteria hanging around the underneath of the seat.

But do you know what those little buggers LOVE to attach themselves to? Oh yes.

That beautifully soft, absorbent toilet paper you've just sat down on.

Basically, every time you flush the toilet, tiny particles of what was in the bowl are thrown up into the air, landing on the cubicle walls, door, handle and paper roll.

So when you fashion yourself a nice little toilet cover from the paper in the stall, you could actually be doing more harm than good.

Which means you're either going to have to start carrying your own toilet seat covers or you're going to have to learn how to hover.

Up to you.

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